Battlepanda: Oh, the humanity...


Always trying to figure things out with the minimum of bullshit and the maximum of belligerence.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Oh, the humanity...

Now that this is happening, can this be far from our future...?

[A doctor's waiting room circa 2020. A man and a woman sitting apart are waiting for their appointments]

MAN: Oh oh. Here they come.

WOMAN: Quick, pretend you're reading that magazine and maybe they'll go away.

[Enter cheerteam with pompoms]

CHEER: If Pizza leaves you feeling ill, ask your Doc for the Purple Pill! Goooooo Nexium!

WOMAN: I don't suffer from heartburn.

[Cheerteam briefly huddles to confer]

CHEER: If you're feeling kind of sad, pop some pills and you'll be glad! Z-O-L, O-F-T! That's what does the trick for me!

MAN: Would you please go away?

CHEER: If you've been letting down the Missus, you will want to know what this-is...

MAN: Get out! Now!

CHEER: Sheesh! Take a chill pill.